Humble Beginnings my ass.

So one of the greatest tricks of elementary school education that I uncovered as a collegehigh school student was that all the holidays and celebrations that are inherently “American” are hella fucked up. Columbus Day (Kill the Savages and Take Their Land), Thanksgiving (KTSATTL II: Whitey Strikes Back), Black History “Month” (Here’s your twenty-eight days) etc., etc. But don’t shoot me! Its really about the celebration (OF PATRIOTISM!111) with friends and family right? And BBQ. Yeaaaah…

Fuck Yeah!

Perhaps as a reward for America’s thankless effort in the War Against Terror, some patriotic archaeologists have found the home of our 1st founding father himself, George Washington, in . While growing up, I envisioned Washington, Adams and the crew as crazy rugged, statuesque, super-people (Culture II Anyone?). Reading about them in history books and stuff, you get a lot of “pulled up by the bootstraps” epic hero shit.

But apparently these “humble beginnings” were as real as Washington’s fabled wooden teeth (i.e. as fake as a wooden nickel):

Dr. Levy and other members of the excavation team said the foundations, stone-lined cellars and other remains suggested that this was far from being the rustic cottage of common perception, but instead one befitting a family of the local gentry. It was a much larger one-and-a-half-story residence, with perhaps eight rooms and an adjacent structure for the kitchen.

Did you ever doubt it?

Call & Response

The Coup – Piss On Your Grave
(from Steal This Album)

Boots & Pam the Funkstress’ humble tribute to the #1 whitey. This song helped me understand what “privalege” is, both the white kind and my own.

your hands is soft as a peach/
cuz you ain’t never did work/
been rich ever since/
your daddy’s dick went squirt/
have you ever hurt from your back?
ducked from rat-a-tat-tats?
seen your mama on crack?
lived in a pontiac?
drank baby similac/
so you could have protein?
(just for enough energy
to hustle up some mo’ green?)

I ain’t no white person, but I’m a college student who don’t gotta worry bout the bills. Uncle Sam takes care of those thanks to my Vietnam Veteran Dad. Is it hypocritical to hate the military/industrial complex, but take and be thankful for their money? Oh opposing truths!

People say I have really soft hands. I wish I had the bankroll to match. Ah well.

PS: Gotta love the mini-skit halfway through—I too, love DC.

About Terry McCall

I'm currently working on everything. INcluding this blog. For the past few hours, I've been keeping some of my typos. In what I write that is.

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